because he was

This morning, like so many mornings now, I woke up thinking about my dad.  Happy Father’s Day, by the way.  I still miss him.  Maybe even more than I did months ago, which is strange because I thought it would get easier.  This morning I kind of smiled when I thought about how I viewed him as I was growing up.  When I was little, I thought he was the greatest man alive.  He was tall and strong with a deep rich reading voice.  His stride when we walked together was twice my height.  When I got older, teenage years, I thought he was great because he knew everything about everything.  He was incredibly smart.  My brother and sisters and I know way more about the Japanese Maple and other various trees than we will ever be able to use.  And as an adult I learned about his character.  His high standards and ethics.  I learned about the sacrifices he made for his family.  The loyalty to his friends.  His generosity toward everyone he knew.

Maybe, maybe… I thought he was the greatest man alive because he was.   And maybe there’s nothing wrong with a girl thinking that.

4 thoughts on “because he was

  1. Ellen, there is nothing at all wrong with that. My mom passed away in ’98 and my dad in ’02 and I still miss them. They both suffered a long time and it took many years for the memories of suffering to go away and the memories of them happy to come back. The first year is the worst – all the firsts without him. I remember waking up and for a split second all was well, until I remembered they were gone. That eventually faded, and it did get easier. I wish I could take this pain away and I’m sorry you are going through this, but I am thinking of you, and praying for you. It sounds like he was a wonderful man. I still remember you talking about your parents at work.

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