Recently, it’s like I’ve been in this book called, the Ridiculous Book of Me and My Dumb Life, and the last few chapters have been really hard to take. Still, I feel like I’ve learned a few things. In silences. Through tears. Large doses of humility. And the truth is, I don’t know if I’m any better of a person for it. I’m still mostly me. Still this flawed human being who is messy and talks too much too soon. That said, I’m trying to keep my heart open. Open to listening more. Loving more. Trying to face fears. One at a time. Trusting that I won’t be consumed by them. Because I haven’t yet.
In the past I have had the tendency to skip ahead. This time I can’t. Not even a few pages. And it’s kind of nice not wanting to.